Hello! Welcome back to my blog, as its the last day of January which feels like it’s lasted 84 years I thought I’d finish this month with a fun little blog. When it comes to being a short person I’m a bit of a pro, I’m only 5ft 1 so as one of the shortest people in my family I’m usually the brunt of all the jokes. Apparently there’s nothing better than giving the people the giggles than being short.
So lets go through the 14 struggles of being a shorty.
1. Having to jump to reach EVERYTHING now this one comes with the territory of being short and having stores that want to get a few giggles a day watching you have to jump to grab some pasta.
2. People asking how the weather is down there. “Well it was bloody lovely until you asked that question and spat your words all over my face dickhead.”
3. Finding trousers to fit, now whilst I’m only 5ft1 I have a fair bit of junk in my trunk because I’m for some reason completely unable to put down the chocolate. so finding trousers that not only fit my ass but don’t make me look like i’m trying to bring back turn ups is a prize in itself.
4. A tall partner, Adam is 6ft 4 and to us it doesn’t mean anything but to others. DEAR GOD! “Aww you’re so little it looks like you’re walking with your dad” GO TAKE A WALK INTO A WALL.
5. Keeping up whilst walking, We’ve all seen Full House wait for me I have little legs. THAT IS MY REALITY, Adam takes around 4 strides to three of my steps. If you’re ever around Bournemouth and hear ” Will you fucking slow down,I cant keep up!” That’s likely me walking to the shops feels like a marathon trying to catch up.
6. LIVING FOR A FOOTSTOOL. In my house we don’t have a footstool because our kitchen is tiny so I have to rely on jumping to reach everything but if you’re a clever short person you’re likely to live for the footstool to reach those out of reach items.
7. Tall cupboards for me the tops of cupboards and top shelves are a place I will never see, the family from ‘Honey I shrunk the kids’ could live up there and I’d have no idea.
8. Top windows, If you follow me on Instagram and watch my stories you’ll be fully aware of the limits I go to to open my top kitchen window, If you don’t then just imagine lots of grunts and whatever kitchen utensil that is within my closest reach, the scoop spoon or the cheese grater are normally my weapon of choice.
9. Clothes, forget trousers just clothes in general. Want to wear a maxi dress and nice shoes? Be prepared to trip and fall, want to wear a short dress, which is short to a ‘normal’ height person but probably has the same effects as a maxi dress. Again going back to the lack of will power to put down chocolate, finding t-shirts that don’t look like dresses are also a struggle.
10. Being reminded that we are short. Like no fucking way I HAD NO IDEA!
11. The memes. I’ll let the image speak for itself.
12. Someone using your head to rest their arm, Why do people do this? Like excuse me you’re pulling on my hair! Go away weirdo.
13. Being asked for ID because of your height. “You look like you should still be in school” You look like you should be minding your own business Graham but here we are…
14.Hugs with tall people. This is probably the thing I dislike the most about being short, going in for a hug and either getting someones boobs in your face or someones stomach. It’s awkward, You both just need the hug to end.
Just a bit of end of January fun, Hope you enjoyed reading the struggles let me know if you relate!