So I’ve never actually written about Harper’s birth, mainly because she was roughly 6 months old when I started this blog, it’s always something I have wanted to write, today I felt was finally the day to do it.
Lets start the day before July 29th My mums car had been robbed and I decided in my infinite wisdom to take the dog out to see if we could find anything that had been stolen, our route involved a lot of hills, I still had a few weeks until my due date so I didn’t think anything of going on this monster walk. That evening I went to bed and no matter what I did, I wasn’t getting comfortable or any sleep again I didn’t think much of it because like I said it was still a few weeks until my due date. I had this theory that she was going to be two weeks early and I didn’t realise how right that was..
So it’s 3am, I’m still wide awake and then felt some weird turn in my stomach then my leg suddenly felt wet. I’ll be honest I thought I was wetting myself, I wasn’t my waters had broke, I woke Adam up to be met with “just go back to sleep you’ll be fine” (cheers buddy!) We were still living with my mum at the time, I sheepishly went to knock on her door ” Mum… I think my waters broke” Up she shot out of bed and rushed me downstairs with my duvet and set me up on the sofa. I had planned a home birth due to my anxiety over hospitals my midwife believed I wouldn’t labour, I couldn’t even get through my glucose tests without passing out so it was set my baby was going to be born at home.
My midwife arrived around 8am to make sure I was ok, gave me some paracetamols and went off again, I had this agonising pain in my legs I couldn’t stand, no one had explained this could be apart of labour until I questioned why my legs hurt. She returned around 2pm with some aromatherapy and gas and air as the old contractions were getting really close, She warned me that I still had a way to go but it would be likely that She’d be here in the next few hours. Those hours were a blur I just remember really wanting to have a wee, I didn’t wee for over 24 hours! The midwife told me it was finally time to push my baby girl was about to enter the world or so I thought. I remember hearing the midwife say just one more and she’ll be here followed by Oh. OH!? She’d turned around at the very last second meaning I had to go to hospital for her to be delivered, at this point I wasn’t bothered I just wanted her out. We got blue lighted to Poole Maternity Hospital were I spent the whole journey off my face on gas and air. I was taken into the delivery suite with paper work trusted into my face to sign.. Why do they do this?! I had no idea what the hell I was signing, I think I just drew a line and passed it off as my signature. That was it I was taken into the delivery room for her to enter the world via forceps. I’ll never forget that spinal injection it fucking hurt they led me down told me to push. I asked the supporting midwife how the hell I was meant to push when they had just paralysed the bottom half of my body!?! I was put onto Oxygen as both of our heart beats had dropped. My heart was in my mouth at 20:07 Harper Rey Alice Robinson entered the world. It was silent. She was placed on my chest for less than a second and then whisked away to the other side of the room, still silence 20 whole minutes of silence. She didn’t make a peep, I was constantly asking the midwives is she ok? why isn’t she crying? I can’t hear her are you sure she’s ok? I had this sense of fear until I saw her for myself I was thinking I would be returning home without my little girl. Why hadn’t she made any noise yet? I looked at the clock and it 20:40. She cried! I led there and watched Adam cut the cord and hold our little girl for the very first time.
He bought her over to me and I’m pretty sure my heart had stopped for a second, she was here alive the most beautiful 3.12kg girl I have ever seen.