It is ok to cry. its also ok to have bad days
Sometimes I quite literally want to tear my eyelashes out one by one, other days i can take a deep breath and realise my problems are very small and minute.
Today was one of the first days and i did not handle it in style. My little one is teething and anyone who has dealt with teething probably knows its a nightmare and if your child takes teething like a pinch of salt – I’m very VERY jealous. My little girl acts like her world is ending but to her it probably is. – Buckle up kid, life is not a box of chocolates contrary to popular belief.
Her sleep pattern is all over the shop and for a mumma who’s had a baby who slept 12 hours a night from 6 weeks old with 3/4 hour naps during the day it was a bit of a reality check when she started waking up more than average and barely napping. Sleep is for the weak right? WRONG! sleep is glorious and i cant wait for her to rediscover that. Ironically im writing this at 2am.
So back to today. Little one wanted to sleep but didn’t want to sleep in her bed, on me, on the sofa, pushchair you get the point. There was tears and tantrums but that was just me.. She FINALLY went down for a nap after several nursery rhymes (Hey diddle diddle can go fuck itself) and i tried to change the bed covers – she must of sensed that i was doing something productive and BAM AWAKE. After copious amounts of spongebob i got her down for another nap (that yellow bastard has magical powers over my daughter that i could only wish to achieve) So i decided to start her dinner. This is where the fun really started today. I made her some gluten free pasta and veg which literally just turned into slop. My dog decides during the time i cook dinner that she will become a limpet and not leave my side – FUN I KNOW. So once slop was cooked it was time for small human to eat. This part went down same as usual eats most, feeds the dog and the rest ends up in her high chair. So dinner went down – time for bum change tonight was not bath night but she decided that she wanted to put her feet all in her dirty nappy YAY!
Bath time went off without a hitch she loves baths so thats simple but removing her from the bath she turned into the spawn of satan. Tears and tantrums and this time it was both of us. i didn’t want to put her on the floor because the bits the dog didn’t pick up she mushed into the floor (Thanks Puppy) So i was going to hoover and let her play on the floor but this was not ok in her world. so i thought AH bed time bottle that’ll calm her down. Oh how wrong i was. She did not want her bottle, she did not want to be held, she did not want to go on the floor or go bed. so i was at a loss. I’ve read a few controversial posts on controlled crying. So this was my last case scenario I get the worst case of mum guilt when she cries but i needed to clear the floor & sort her high chair the cat now decided he wanted to start snooping on the chair. so i decided to attempt to take the cover off. The creator of the My Babiie high chair must be one of those sadistic people who enjoy others pain. It was a ballache. i managed to just about get the cover off and the dog decided to knock the chair on the floor – It lived there till my boyfriend got home from work. (a get the fuck home now text was sent) Baby was still crying so we tried everything again and nothing. Thankfully boyfriend got home at this time so she was “his problem now”
Once he got home i went outside for a cigg and a cry and i realised that mum life is the biggest high and low in life. One day she is the greatest little person on the planet who is all sweetness smiles and laughter & Other days she is satan but at the same time is still the greatest little person to crawl the earth.
Shes my best friend and my main reason to live. I would be absolutely lost without her.
From now on im going to take the rough with the smooth and remember every day with her is an adventure. Just some days the adventures arent the best and the rest of the days theyre the best.
Its also a wonder i dont drink.